Saturday, November 30, 2002
by Eileen Kramer
Here is a person who almost broke a mailing list called Ladies' Retreat. She did it by replying to a post by P. P lost her daughter, Rosie, to cancer some years ago. P started Rosie's Love to perpetuate her daughter's memory. It's an organization that provides additional comfort and support to families of children with cancer. P spent Friday morning in the mall hawking CD's for Rosie's Love.
She was disappointed that a lot of people ignored her. Another list member and I wrote back that people are preoccupied and that they often give in lots of other ways. The other list member was a bit more charitable than I am, but I did not feel I was obligated to support P or laud Rosie's Love. I just felt I was obligated to say nothing bad.
Well my post was too much for P and I drove her off the list. I am waiting for the listowner to chew me a new anal orifice. I'm not sure I deserve it. I could have said a lot more. Rosie's Love is a prime example of SECONDARY GAIN. Yes, it is sad when a loved one dies, but most of us don't make a loved one's death or illness into a public cause.
One can also argue quite reasonably that money is better spent helping poor families in one's home town or poor children
whose survival is threatened by hunger and curable disease, rather than helping middle class families stricken with a health crisis. It's a judgement call, and a great conversation topic for an ethics class or even a mailing list brave enough to take it on.
And speaking of mailing lists, I did a lot of thinking while I was out on my unsuccessful foray to the soap shop for some hand made soap to give as office gifts. I decided that it was time to make more use of this blog. This is my QC-L. It is where I can say whatever I want as loudly as I want and with nobody threatening to throw me off or put me on review. I forget how excellent that is. It is hard to talk without an audience. I basicly have to discipline myself to pretend one is here. Fake it till you make it is my slogan.
From now on I'll be blogging every day and if I get booted from Ladies' Retreat, I'll rename this blog QC-L and Ladies' Retreat. It will be my substitute for both. I'll also tell people on Netdynam and Future Culture when I have new entries up. This way I'll be sure of an audience. Neat huh.... Life is not so bad after all. No one can make me shut up.
Monday, November 25, 2002
by Eileen Kramer
What better place to play this game than here. Here is the name of the game and I friend of mine proposed it. It goes like this. Write down sentences about yourself starting with "here is the person who......" You are here. I am here. Let's begin:
Here is the person who is expert at unsatisfying multitasking.
Here is the person who revised her vita over the weekend.
Here is the person who would like to be somebody else.
Here is the person who is planning a great feast.
Here is a person who ought to check her voice mail.
Here is a person who may get no showed by her boyfriend.
Here is a person who is due on the desk in twenty-five minutes.
Here is a person who just wrote about a character chased by phantoms.
Here is a person with one very special friend who suggested this game.
Here is a person who has a common talent that is not appreciated in this culture.
Here is a person with fourteen years reference library experience.
Here is a person who is ashamed of being bored.
Here is a person with a lot of cooking to do tonight.
Here is a person who sometimes dreads walking at night.
Here is a person who sometimes loves walking at night.
Here is a person who feels good walking.
Here is a person who fears her own dark thoughts.
OK, enough. I don't think this went anywhere. I'll try more tomorrow. Tomorrow we have the great Thanksgiving potluck/feast at work. I am actually looking forward to it. I think that is a good thing. There will be a lot of food I can't eat but that will be fine. OK, it is time to check my voicemail. It is also time to blog more regularly. I think I'm doig that.
Blogging keeps me reasonably centered. I found a good place to get a counter for this blog: statsmachine.com. I also finished, except for one small mistake,
my colleague's web page. I try. I wish I succeeded more often.
My intestines hurt in that awful bloated impacted way. I wonder if walking will loosen them up. OK, time for some phone calls.
Wednesday, November 06, 2002
by Eileen Kramer
I've been too busy with C time to blog but boy have I been busy. First,
Less than Three Percent got a face lift. I also added one new essay. The essays don't look
like much but so what. Second, A Girl of the Future is now essentially complete unless I
think of sequels. It has twenty-one (21) chapters and something approaching a very sad ending. This means there
will be two pages in something approaching fighting trim.
The bad news is that Angwel's Extraodrinary World lost its entire store. World Crossing wiped the board for inactivity. I think it had only been inactive for a couple of months, so I got the site a new board and now have to start a new story there. I just did Ghostletters this morning and even cleaned out the box enough that there will be no problem of overflow for a couple of weeks. This makes me feel good though again my characters are off on their own. Naama is in love and having an affair. Luchi-Xara and the littles are travelling all over New York state and Pennsylvania and the northeast meeting other littles. You get the idea.
Monday night, I downloaded MusicNum from this site and I can now create my own midi. They sound a bit repetitive and some math knowledge is required to make them work. The toy is fun to play with though.
I teach today at 4:30pm. Since I've been up since around 3:30am, I'm going to be beat. I'll probably collapse in my tracks when I come home. That won't be fun since I plan to make a spaghetti squash tonight. I guess I won't have a recipe ready for Thursday. Actually my green goddess salad dressing recipe will do. Ladies' Retreat works on a schedule.
I still don't know who won for senator from Georgia. I cast a write-in vote since both candidates voted for the war in Iraq. Saxby Chambliss is a piece of racist scum, but Bill McLelland is not much better. I guess I'll see if they announce the local races on the news. It was too early for local news when I had the radio on before. This was some morning already. I made four hardboiled eggs and burned them. One of them blew apart in the pan. I ate some of it and since it was still good, I kept the others and made a sandwich for breakfast with one. I couldn't bring myself to eat last night's dinner again.
I wonder if I'll feel bad if I find out that Chambliss won. I don't think it will make that much difference. I did my hair in the wee hours of the morning and did a ton of channeling. I got hold of everyone except Van. I feel bad about that but I saw him Sunday and what I saw this morning was sweet. Writing log daily is just too much of a chore but it is good to have my spiritual life back. It's something people who don't have contact with spirits can never really understand. It makes me feel good to have a foot in two worlds.
Well it looks like people on Ladies' Retreat have answered my "Getting to Know You" letter. I always find other peoples' so boring. Oh well, so much for life in the spotlight. I hope I'm not in trouble.
Sunday, November 03, 2002
by Eileen Kramer
Not much C time today. I did finish the postcards and I made green godess dressing using the brand new blender. It is always scarey taking a new appliance on its maiden voyage. Well the good news is that the new blender rund rings around its predecessor that was retired to the garbage corral due to a broken plastic seal in its bottom. It leaked all over the place. The new machine macerated those anchovies to make the legendary green godess dressing. I eat salad year around.
I have come to the conclusion that most people eat all manner of garbage and don't care what they put in their mouths. They'll eat processed food and restaurant food and never for a moment think that food could be any different. Home cooked food is made with so many other flavors and ingredients, it is amazing. I think of seasonal foods because I cook.
I don't think I'm a real foodie. I've never met any real foodies anywhere. They seem to exist only in magazines like the one published with the Sunday New York Times or on food TV channels. I may have tastes a little too pedestrian to be a real foodie though I'd love to meet some real foodies and find out.
I'm still channeling though I did not write log. I had a great dream about being in a huge bath house near a pool and a big beach with white sand. I had never been to such a place though it reminded me quite a bit of Lake Worth in Florida. I think this beach was nicer though. There was a grass beach above the sandy one and the sea was calm, no breakers. The beach was quite crowded and I liked that. I couldn't wait to get outside but the bath house was so big, it was hard to find one's way out.
I went grocery shopping tonight and found Publix miserably picked over. The produce department looked sad and sorry. I should have gone earlier in the day. I managed to get a huge brocoflower. I'll make stir fry with that. I am going to Country Life to get some TVP tomorrow and that should get me close enough to the River Walk to spend some time there. I may even pack lunch if I feel ambitious. So much for C time.
I also stopped by the pet store to say "hello" to the kittens in the kitten cage. One of the kittens had an eye that was stuck shut with an infection and another had a turd hanging impacted from its butt. There were excrement stains on the bottom of the cage. One of the kitten's probably the one with the gigantic traveler had diarreah. I would never buy any live animal from that establishment after seeing how they keep their kittens, and the poor little kitten with the eye infection has beautiful blue fur and a very sweet personality and a loud meow too. No, I'm not in the market for a kitten. Two fur children is more than enough. Actually it's just right.
On the way down to the supermarket, a kid who was helping her older brothers or maybe her father clean up around the Light House Baptist Church invited me for services. I actually thought about going. The kid's first name is the same as my middle name though I spell my middle name differently. I know I'd be bored stiff at services which is a shame. I thought the invitation was very thoughtful and sweet. It's a pity I'll probably oversleep the morning service and be too busy for the evening service, and I'm Jewish so what do I want with a rather strange Baptist church where the women all wear below the knees skirts, even for casual wear. I wear those skirts for week but on the weekends I wear pants.
It would be as much a cultural problem as a religious one down at that church. I don't think they even know it. I went
there for a revival once. Revivals fascinate me. Well I have another day of freedom until I return to work. There is a good chance, if I keep being good at work that I will run out of things to do. This is a scarey proposition. I'll be waiting on Erma and a woman who is supposed to email me her hospital library's list of journals. I wonder which slowpoke will come under the wire first while I twiddle my thumbs. Yes, I could have C time at work but I am not sure it's such a great place for that.
Saturday, November 02, 2002
by Eileen Kramer
The midi hunt was SUCCESSFUL You can listen for yourself.
I also found a midi for the guestbook at my site. I know of a midi for the
RAOK guestbook but the site has vanished. I think the owner is moving it. When it comes up again, I'll visit and
download the thing. I hate when stuff slips through my fingers like that.
I guess I can say I had some good C time today. My shrink thinks it's time to look for another job. I want to diet down to where I don't have to buy another interview suit. Actually my interview suit is very uncomfortable. I'm not sure what it will do to the office politics when I start job hunting in earnest. Everyone gets to know about it after a while. I'd feel really weird taking the time off to be flown to interviews. I think on my current job, I'd actually get static about it. I'm not sure who would write me a reference. Some of my best references have died or moved on to better opportunities. All of this paints one scarey picture.
I should have sent postcards tonight. I owe four or five of them for HugznFlowers. Sending postcards counts as C time because choosing the images is a creative endeavor. I feel good about the music and bad about the postcards.
I also found out why the food we get for onegs at schul is so unimaginative. Thomas, the cook, makes it or buys it and no one goes in and does the work. If we did the work we could have such seasonal treats as fruit salad with apples or pumpkin bread. Well now that I'm a dues paying member I can recommend some of this. I wonder if Thomas will mind me cooking in the schul kitchen. I'm not sure how far in advance onegs are scheduled. I'd love to be more active in my schul.
I am also looking forward to hosting for thanksgiving this year. It looks like my boyfriend and his brother may come down. Time to work up a menu, probably cholent, and some salads, and an apple kuchen or some ginger snaps (home made
Hertzel, my boy kitty, is tearing up papers in the most methodical way imaginable. He is driven to it. I stop now and then to kiss his white furry head. When I pet him, he arches his back. He sniffs me and he purrs. He is a very serious but very sweet boy.
Well that's it for tonight. I hope I can meditate productively. Tomorrow I buy cat litter (No I haven't done that yet) and food and do some more cooking and cleaning. I want to get to the River Walk this weekend. I wonder if I'll make it.